WHO CAN INVEST
Did you make bank on $GME, $AMC or anything Elon mentioned?
Did you cash in at your startup's IPO?
Think you can invest in this fund? You probably aren't rich enough.
Do you have ridiculous money, we're talking tres comas rich !
If you can't blow away $10k-150k then we're not your fund.
"What's the point of having fuck you money if you never say fuck you?"
Booby 'Axe' Axelrod
Founder & CEO, AXE Capital
OUR INVESTMENT FOCUS
We invest that extra pile of cash you made from stonks.
What will you invest it in?
Doesn't matter. - That's for us to know and you not to care
Could be saving the world from Co2, Kanye's latest idea or the most riddiculous startup with an insane valuation. You'll never know and it doesn't matter.
It's your Fuck you money, take a bet, waste it with us!
At least you'll be part of this investment club! Heck you might get a tshirt out of it if you're nice.
Can't afford to invest? You don't have enough FYM.
We invest to make you even richer, like stupid rich!
We have access to the best deals around. The ones that only come from private, secret networks.
We know the best people. All of them.
Your deals are guaranteed a return. From internet credit to dogecoin, it's going to be big!
Thought it does sort of involve Space, Cars and Bitcoin.
Think of this as bragging rights. You get to invest with the
only fund that's going to throw your money away on riddiculous
investments. Could be Elon Musk's next venture, could be
co-investing with BadUnicorn.vc, could be helping girls scouts
or buying GameStock entirely.
You won't know until you do it.
Ya Basic Tier
You used Grandma's money and you bought $AMC, not quite a $GME winner, but close.
News outlets will hear about you for sure!
You will become a god amongst the investor world.
We invest in stonks. Simple
You have questions
The first rule of Fuck You Money capital is that you don't ask what we are investing in. We might tell you one day. When we IPO probably. We've got WeWork's playbook, so we'll solid.
If you're asking, you're probably poor. Go see some VC.
We're only for the ultra mega rich. The stronks rich. Don't ask again.
We invest following a complicated algorithm that you
wouldn't understand. It's basically a riddiculous factor x
fun factor x magic x elon's tweet probability x reddit
mentions + some magic numbers we get from how many people
followed us on Clubhouse that day.
The rest is secret.
Ha. You're funny.
Maybe. There's a 12% admin charge to do so. It goes to
feeding the unicorns* we need to use to achieve this.
*no unicorns will be harmed in this process. mostly they will be cuddled.
Don't slide into my DM's or anything. Just email me so that I can ignore you and blame it on Google's SPAM settings.
Get your people to reach out to our people.
They will know what to do.
Want to raise with us?